Saturday, December 5, 2009

The 'Wild Women of Wongo' are mostly tame

Wild Women of Wongo (1959)
Starring: Jean Hawkshaw, Mary Ann Webb, Johnny Walsh, Cande Gerrard, Adrienne Bourbeau, Rex Richards, Zuni Dyer and Ed Fury
Director: James L. Wolcott
Rating: One of Ten Stars

In a time before time, sexy women and homely men live together on the fertile island of Wongo, while handsome men and unattractive women reside on the nearby island of Goona. When attacks from mysterious sea-faring ape men bring the two civilizations into contact with one another, lust and hormones run rampant and hijinx ensue. Hijinx ensue.

"Wild Women of Wongo" is a movie that sucks on every level. It's a sex comedy that's not funny and doesn't have any sex (or even nudity), it's got some of the worst catfights ever caught on film, a torturous amount of random shots of a Florida park that's passing for an ancient jungle used to pad the running-time, and a cast of "actors" who would embarrass the directors of grade school plays with their lack of talent. The same goes for the casting director, who has an eye for ugly women, but didn't seem to be able to find similarly ugly men for the Wongo village.

The only good things there are about this film is that lead Wild Woman Jean Hawkshaw is cute and the underwater photography is clear. (Of course, the underwater photography is mostly used to show Hawkshaw wrestling with a baby alligator in a very long, very boring sequence.)

A remake of "Wild Women of Wongo" from the people and actresses involved in Seduction Cinema releases might be worth checking out (for the added nudity and sex, if nothing else)... but this film should be avoided.